Dreaming in Color

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Day 5: Gifts of Conflict, and Change


When I looked at today's item to be thankful for, this one stirred up a lot of emotions for me. I have a very difficult time thanking God for all of my hardships. Hindsight, yeah, I can see why I went through the things I did, but now. Currently. This. Very. Moment. The last thing I want to do is give thanks for being stuck an extra time (with a very large needle might I add) or almost passing out while giving plasma. And this isn't the first time these things have happened. They occurred a few weeks ago! I just want to sit here and cry about it (I'm such a baby sometimes. ha.).

<<<Here is my battle would...It's not that bad.



In all actuality, what I went through today is very small compared to the grand scheme of things. Reflecting on my scary ordeals at plasma, I am thankful for the first scare. That conflict better prepared me for when it happened today. I wasn't freaking out as much, I knew that I was going to be okay, and I knew how to deal with it. It's very hard to be thankful for that, but I'm coming around to it.

Now to the topic of change. Hmmm. This is a hard one for me also. Goodness! Today is just a hard day all around! I have a difficult time with change. Moving, new job, unforeseen circumstances, sometimes even unexpected changes in plan; all of these things are quite a challenge for me. Eventually, I get over it and become accustomed to the new way that things are, but those first few moments of the change are very stressful for me. Like I said above, because I went through the first experience, it better prepared me for the second time around. The same thing goes with change. The more I experience change, the more opportunities I have to learn how to deal with it and for that I am thankful. I like to think that I'm getting better at it ;)



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